On November 6, 2016, I finally made the decision to stop drinking any alcohol including wine. GOD has been pulling at me to stop drinking for almost two years. I was being stubborn and felt that I had it under control. That I would be forgiven in the morning for my actions.. GOD knows my heart... All the excuses. Can you relate? I am sure you can. I know that I am not alone in my struggle with walking away from alcohol. It obviously had a hold on me. Excessive drinking -> irrational decisions -> hangover -> careless actions -> regrets. With this type of drinking you will never have control over your actions, mind or resist the temptations that will come your way. I even thought that purposely going out sober some nights meant I had control and I could control my want for alcohol. I was fooling myself. Now don't get me wrong, I wasn't drinking everyday but when I did it was in excess. That was my problem!
If I can be transparent, I didn't have my first drink until I was 18. From then on, I couldn't possibly go to a bar, kickback, party or club without first pre-gaming. It was a must! When I would go out, people would ask what my favorite alcohol was or type. I enjoyed drinking brown and Hennessy was my favorite but on some nights I would drink tequila. I knew which drink would get me to where I wanted to get my mind off any problems or issues that may have happen that day or week that affected me negatively. Thinking it would clear my mind but all it did was cloud it. Some nights I didn't even remember all the events that happen the night before. I consider myself a smart woman but I wasn't making smart decisions by putting myself in that type of danger. So this tug a war between my want of alcohol and obeying/listening to the holy spirit continued for almost two years. GOD's unfailing love and patience for me is amazing and I am so undeserving of it. Who would wait around for two years for someone to get themselves together? But GOD!
While spending time with my boyfriend after church on November 6th, I had a revelation. This decision would be important in GOD's ministry and my work within the ministry for his kingdom. GOD pushing me to make this decision wasn't solely about me. GOD will strip things from us that are hindering us from becoming more like him. As Christians, some of the things we try to hold on to are causing us to come off as hypocrites. We can cause the new believer to be confused or believe that are behavior is right. Do you realize how much damage that can cause? As followers of Jesus Christ, we represent him. We must always remember that. Of course it's not always going to be easy. We will have our days but we have to remember that people are always watching us whether you believe or not. We have to be intentional about our walk with GOD, our lives, our words and our action.
Have a Great Week!
Ebony
